Pemberton Paradise: Unforgettable Beedelup House Cottage Stay
Alright, buckle up, buttercups, because we're diving headfirst into a review of a hotel, and I'm not just gonna give you the bullet points. I'm gonna live the bullet points. This is gonna be less "polished travel blog" and more "relatable human frantically scribbling notes in a hotel room at 3 AM because the free Wi-Fi is actually decent."
The Big Picture (and Getting There)
Okay, so, Hotel Name (that's what this review is about, obviously, I'm just being coy) – the name itself, it's… fine. Nothing jumps out. But that's okay! Sometimes a name is just a name. Let's focus on what matters.
First things first: Accessibility. HUGE shoutout to them for listing it (and hopefully actually being accessible). Elevator? Check. Facilities for disabled guests? Listed. Wheelchair accessible? Fingers crossed! I didn't actually get to physically test this (I'm not, you know, wheelchair-bound), but the fact they mentioned it gives me hope. I HATE hotels that pretend accessibility is a thing.
Then, the "Getting Around" part: Airport transfer? Yes! Bless. After a long flight, you're not in the mood for haggling with taxi drivers. Car park [free of charge]? Even better. Free parking is like a unicorn these days. Car park [on-site]? Also convenient. Taxi service? Good to have as a backup.
But let's cut to the chase: the internet. My lifeblood.
Internet access? YES! Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!? DOUBLE YES! Actually, Free Wi-Fi in public areas? AND YES! Okay, you got me there, Hotel Name. You're speaking my language. Internet [LAN]? Hmm, a little old-school but still a pro for some people. Internet services? Unclear… We’ll have to see!
Now, the "Things To Do" and "Ways to Relax" - because let's be honest, we're all here to escape, aren't we?
Spa? Listed. Good start! Spa/sauna? Okay, getting warmer. Sauna? Alright, I'm intrigued. Steamroom? YES! See, this is where I get excited. I love a good steam. Massage? Essential. Body scrub, body wrap? Oooh la la! I might need a full day just to unwind. Fitness center, Gym/fitness? Ugh, fine, I'll drag myself there eventually (the guilt always gets to me). Pool with view, Swimming pool [outdoor], Swimming pool? YES! I’m a sucker for a pool. I want to spend the day floating in the water!
The Rooms (and Everything In Them)
This is where the rubber meets the road. Do they live up to the hype? The list is long, so let's start with the essentials: Air conditioning? CHECK. Thank the gods. Alarm clock? Good for those of us who still rely on those things. Air conditioning in public area? Smart! Bathrobes & Slippers? Luxury is my middle name. Bathtub? Yes, please! Blackout curtains? Another must-have. Closet? Necessary. Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Free bottled water? Hello, in-room convenience! Daily housekeeping? Always welcome! Desk, Laptop workspace? I can work in the comfort of my room too, I'm a big fan. Extra long bed? Hallelujah for taller guests! Hair dryer, Ironing facilities? Practical. I'm digging it. Mini bar? Interesting… Non-smoking? Yes! Private bathroom, Separate shower/bathtub? Yes! Satellite/cable channels? Check. Seating area, Sofa? Good for lounging. Soundproofing, Window that opens? YES!
My Room Experience: A confession and some observations
Okay, let's be honest. I have a confession. I'm a smoker. Not a proud smoker mind you, but a smoker nonetheless. Which leads me to the Smoking area. Because it's a hotel I can't sneak one in the room. No, I'm not proud! But you know what's a perk when you are trying to quit? Room options! This is already a win!
I'm in my room, and it's… okay. Not the most inspiring décor, let's be real. Standard hotel-issue everything. Carpeting? Yeah, it's there. And the window! Breaks for joyful moment. It opens! That's a serious plus. Some hotels seal those things shut, like they’re afraid the outside world will get in. And the internet? Yep, it's fast. The free Wi-Fi REALLY is free. Now, let me tell you, I need that. I’m a travel blogger! And well, I'm stuck in my room while I work, and I may be getting lazy!
Alright, back to features. I looked for some more features, like Additional toilet. I was disappointed, but one can't have everything. My verdict? The basics are covered. You're not going to feel overwhelmed. But it's… functional. Let's put it that way.
Food, Glorious Food (and the All-Important Alcohol)
This is where hotels can really shine (or crumble).
Dining, drinking, and snacking? This is where the Hotel Name needs to impress. The options are plentiful!
Restaurants, A la carte in restaurant, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, and Western cuisine in restaurant. Now that's options. I wonder how well they actually do all that (Buffet is also my favorite).
Breakfast in room, Breakfast takeaway service? Score! I sometimes struggle to get out of bed.
Happy hour? YES. (I've got a weakness.) Bar, Bottle of water, Room service [24-hour]? More yeses.
Alternative meal arrangement, Asian breakfast? Sure. I'm not normally a huge fan of Asian cuisine, but it's nice to have options. Essential condiments? Important, it's a must. Kids meal? For families, great!
My Food Experience: The Good, the Bad, and the Hangry
Okay so, breakfast. The Breakfast [buffet] looked amazing. Let's be honest, I loaded up. The coffee was surprisingly good! And the "buffet" – a decent one, honestly. Waffles? Check. Bacon? Check. So far, so good.
But! and it's a big one… the service. It felt… rushed. Like they wanted me to get in and get out. I wanted to spend the morning, but the staff were kind of… absent. They were constantly refilling the buffet, but they never came over to check if I was happy. Okay, so, one bad point. But it was a minor one.
Safety and the COVID factor:
This is essential now. Cleanliness and safety? Anti-viral cleaning products, Cashless payment service, Daily disinfection in common areas, Doctor/nurse on call, First aid kit, Hand sanitizer, Hot water linen and laundry washing, Hygiene certification, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Room sanitization opt-out available, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Shared stationery removed, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment? They seem to be taking it very seriously. That’s good. Front desk [24-hour]? Always a plus. Security [24-hour], Smoke alarms, Fire extinguisher, CCTV outside property, CCTV in common areas? Yes, safety is a must.
Services and Conveniences (because life's too short for inconvenience)
Air conditioning in public area. Check. Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center. Okay, that's a LOT to process.
Okay, let's see. Concierge? Always useful for advice and help. Contactless check-in/out? Good! Very good. Currency exchange, Cash withdrawal, Laundry and dry cleaning? Convenient. Luggage storage?
Indee Home: Delhi & NCR's #1 Choice for [Specific Service/Product]?
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because this isn't your grandma's perfectly-polished travel itinerary. We're talking about BEEDELUP HOUSE COTTAGES, PEMBERTON, AUSTRALIA, and trust me, it's probably going to be a glorious, slightly chaotic mess. Prepare for some serious nature-induced feels, a healthy dose of Aussie charm, and possibly a minor breakdown over the sheer beauty of it all.
Beedelup House Cottages: The Pemberton Pilgrimage (Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Damp)
Day 1: The Arrival & The "Oh My God, This Is Stunning" Moment
- Morning (ish): Flight to Perth (ugh, airports, the bane of my existence). Rental car pickup. Try REALLY hard not to accidentally drive on the wrong side of the road. I swear, Australia is a conspiracy against left-handed people.
- Afternoon: The DRIVE. Cruising south. The landscape slowly morphs from scrubby beige to lush green. My jaw, already a bit loose from the pre-trip anxiety, finally drops. I'm thinking I'm going to have a very strong reaction (good one) to this.
- Late Afternoon/Early Evening: ARRIVAL AT BEEDELUP HOUSE! Okay, so the website photos are beautiful, but NOTHING prepares you for the real thing. It's like… a fairytale. Literally. The cottage. The trees. The lake. Honestly, I actually gasped a little. (Don't judge – I’m easily impressed by nature).
- The unpacking debacle: Try to keep my cool and ignore the fact that my suitcase is heavier than a small child, I decide to unpack.
- Evening: Settling in to the cottage. Fireplace. Wine. More gawking. (Yes, I’m easily pleased, I did mention that). I am going to try to get a fire going in the fireplace. I read about this and it seems pretty simple, right? Narrator voice: It wasn't simple. It involved a lot (really a lot) of smoke, a slight panic attack, and eventually, a semi-successful blaze that almost set off the smoke alarm. We got some wine and cheese to calm down.
Day 2: Giants, Waterfalls, and Existential Dread (Kidding…mostly)
- Morning: THE GLOUCESTER TREE! Holy. Freaking. Cow. This thing is massive. The climb is pretty strenuous. The view from the top? Absolutely breathtaking. I may or may not have shed a tear. (Don't worry, it was a happy tear…mostly). I mean, looking at the forest and the view from the top of a tree.
- Mid-morning: Okay, I am on a high. It's time to do some hiking. We do a hike, not too long. We get to see a waterfall, which makes me even happier.
- Lunch: Picnic by the Beedelup Falls. This place is so beautiful, I think my inner Instagrammer is having a field day. I eat a sandwich, enjoy the moment. I could stay here.
- Afternoon: The most gorgeous walk. We might get lost. It's fine, right? It's a walk in the woods. At least, I thought. I started to have real questions about my life decisions. The forest can be a bit intimidating…
- Evening: Fireplace round two (with less smoke this time, thanks to the helpful tips from the cottage's resident ghost…kidding, of course). We ate. We read. We had another glass of wine and decided to say yes to some more wine and cheese.
Day 3: Lake Life, Relaxation, or Maybe Just More Wine
- Morning: Breakfast on the porch. The birds are chirping. The air smells like… well, like a magical forest. This might be heaven. I think. I love the porch.
- Mid-morning/Early Afternoon: A relaxing exploration of the Lake. Just me, some water, and the trees. I am going to be fine. The lake is so quiet and peaceful. I am going to float around, maybe read a book.
- Afternoon/Evening: Dinner in Pemberton. We had to find a restaurant. We got some more wine. And we went back to the cottage. Maybe after the meal and the wine, we will visit the lake some more.
Day 4: Farewell, Pemberton. (I Already Miss It)
- Morning: Last breakfast on the porch. The sun is shining. I don’t really want to leave. I will just sit and look for a while longer.
- Late Morning: Check out. Say goodbye to the cottage. Wave goodbye to the trees. Tears. (Okay, maybe a few tears).
- Afternoon: Drive back to the airport in Perth. Reflect on how much I love this place. I am going to come back.
- Evening: Depart. I am going to come back.
Important Notes (Because This Trip Won't Plan Itself):
- Expect the Unexpected: This is a rough guide. Go with the flow. Get lost on purpose. Embrace the mess.
- Pack for ALL weather: Layers, people! It can be sunny, then rainy, then sunny again in the space of an hour.
- Food: Stock up on groceries in Pemberton. The cottage has a kitchen, and you'll want to cook some of your own meals. There is a local shop.
- Wildlife: Be mindful of the local fauna. Keep a respectable distance, and for the love of all that is holy, don't feed the kangaroos (or any other creature).
- Most Importantly: Take a Deep Breath & ENJOY! This place is magical. It’s okay to feel everything. Scream into the void (of the forest), cry happy tears, eat ALL the cheese. Just be present. And try not to get too lost. Good luck! You'll need it. And I hope you don't go crazy like me. Just… have a lovely time.
Okay, so, what *IS* the real deal? Like, what's the...thing...we're talking about, anyway?
But... specifically, is there *any* theme? Like, even a teeny, tiny one?
You sound...opinionated. Is that...accurate?
So, you mentioned coffee. What's *your* perfect cup? Don't leave me hanging!
What is something that you *absolutely* hate?
Any advice for someone who wants to... well, do whatever you do? (I'm probably going to regret asking...)
Alright, random question: What's the silliest thing you've ever done?
Last question (for now, anyway...): What makes you happy?
